What Grieving my Mom Means
Grief Is an albatross A missing birthday card Not being able to call when my cat dies Wondering who will remind me I'm smart Being jealous of women with mothers Hating men for not understanding Looking about 10 years older, overnight Snapping Nightmares A giddy addiction to "Two and a Half Men" Missing your stuffed cabbage Wanting to sleep so I can maybe dream of you Worrying that you didn't need to die that day Being tired of being sad Remembering your laugh and your snort How you made fun of me for not farting How you were glad I had my cat but he maybe scared you a little Your flirtatiousness Your schoolteacher scolding if I used poor grammar Asking me what a word meant as I learned more of them in grad school Your tenderness Your unconditional love